The world is a very messed up place because most people are horrifically fucking terrible. Most of us only do anything right out of fear or purely self-serving, ulterior, juvenile bullshit. The main goal of human maturity is to consistently and reasonably find that any contention or impasse is primarily the fault of others and that almost everyone is a waste of your time. None of us are much different compared to the creator but we're at very different places of development and doing extremely better or worse, both holistically and at anything specific. Direct, open, honest, sensitive and adequate communication is the litmus test above all else. Then critical thinking, integrity, courage, foresight, fairness, compromise, sacrifice and grace. Anyone pushing up on others without coming correct is totally non-serious and detrimental. Fuck you and your manipulation, scheming, chaos, unconstitutional treachery and stupidity.

In memory of Aaron Bushnell and 30,000 murdered innocent Palestinian civilians.

I was arrested for seeking shelter at the height of the coronavirus pandemic last December. Been dragged through the court system for the past year. First two holiday seasons after five years of parole have been completely ruined. Would still be in jail likely if I hadn't bailed out. They're sending me to trial for likely mandatory sentencing in an animal cage and additional years of supervision for doing absolutely nothing to anyone. I barely made it half a year after parole before being arrested again. Founded on genocide and slavery, billions tortured unnecessarily through mass incarceration, millions killed at war just to feed the rich and millions killed just now by the worst pandemic in our lifetimes and we still haven't learned a single fucking thing about humanity, love, mercy, empathy, justice or progress. These are my final thoughts before being pushed off the world just for the hell of it.

There are no good guys. There is no god. Justice, democracy, equality and love are a complete fallacy. Human life has no value in modern society, if it ever did previously. This is the world that I live in and fuck anybody who says otherwise. People living in cages like animals by the millions and most people like it. People being forever tortured and killed across the globe with everything we earn and spend, without any democratic process or criminal accountability. Damn near every single person at the top of society is there solely because they have no heart, guts or distinguishable individual character, identity, vision or free will. Things just keep getting worse. Espionage, voyeurism, conditioning, coercion, control, blackmail, assassination, genocide and colonial rape culture are pushing humanity to extinction with a smile. Acceptance and total reform is survival. Everything else is death.

Tough weather day and trouble seems to be just about everywhere. Started getting too low and needed something creative so I threw some ideas together and made it to sundown. This is the last of some old poems I found in storage recently. They were hand written on pocket notebook paper from memory about a dozen years ago while overseas in Europe.

A simple and naive high school poem about peace and love on God's green Earth. After years of researching America's never-ending unconstitutional wars and global tyranny I've seen enough. The total collapse of Afghanistan after two decades of pointless death and destruction is too painful to deal with at the moment. Thoughts and prayers to Americans, Afghans, Iraqis and everyone else directly affected by all of these evil and counterproductive fucking wars. The U.S. Empire has about 1,000 military bases in at least 40 countries. We've recently fought in 14 different countries, drone bombed 7 and maintain economic sanctions on 23 otherwise sovereign nations. Sorry if the numbers aren't exact (!@#$%^&*).

Someone extraordinary gave me the most divine gift recently and I wanted to thank them from the bottom of my heart. This poem from sometime around 2004 has at last found a worthy traveling companion, wherever the four winds may guide you. It never felt just right but the sentiment is there. Can still remember writing it while walking back and forth along a hillside of daisies at work, keeping balance on a cement parking lot curb below a freeway. Seems like a million years ago but the feelings are the same. Thank you.

After suffering a major legal setback I've decided there just isn't enough time and inspiration left to believe that love will flourish again before I pass on. The bad people have had their way with me for too damn long and I can either reasonably adjust expectations or blow a gasket at some point. I'm finally conceding that life is every bit as terrible as I perceive it to be after more than half a lifetime of extreme personal trauma and horrified observation. The only way to avoid self-destruction is to fully embrace the legitimate hatred that I feel and manage the hell out of it so I don't give it to the next poor bastard. I'll be focusing on sympathy, gratitude, humility, forgiveness, education and healthy social interaction to help prevent righteous indignation from sliding into destructive emotional outbursts.

A critical re-evaluation of September 11, 2001 shows that American/Israeli neocon extremists are solely responsible for the attacks. Trillions were embezzled from the DoD for Israel and 240 billion in laundered covert securities involving George H. W. Bush were due for inspection on September 12, 2001. All evidence and personnel that could expose these crimes were targeted. The 1993 WTC bombing and Osama Bin Laden's declarations of war against the U.S. were leveraged to blame it all on Arab terrorists. The last 19 years of global death and destruction were scripted following the Cold War to turn the Middle East into a functioning American colonial outpost for Wall Street and the Military-Industrial Complex.

When you realize that your mistakes, hardships, gifts and talents have a significant purpose and people won't let you do anything good with it, life can get especially strange. After several years of sadistic torture I am still being setup for failure and threatened with enslavement for asking to be treated more humanely. This parole bullshit is supposed to be over in three months finally and they're still pushing me toward getting wrecked somehow. Dear Sacramento, California and United States of America, I am not your bitch. I am an American citizen. I have served in your military. I love this country. Please get the fuck away from me! If anything good happens I'll stop in with an update.

PrisonRef has been updated. It's a miracle and everything is there to fix the Criminal Justice System. If the project moves another inch it will be someone else's fault because I am completely done subjecting myself to the American nightmare. The mobile version of the site isn't finished but it works pretty well. After shoring up the desktop presentation I simply couldn't take anymore. All-in-all I would say PrisonRef is about 60-70 percent finished.

The second major update of the site is finished and I couldn't be happier with the results. Super proud of how far along things have progressed over the past several years and exceedingly grateful to everyone who has shared in the process. Thank you, Framers of the U.S. Constitution, every soul who has fought and died to uphold free speech in America, and the totally freakin' awesome web design community online. One never knows what tomorrow may bring but for the moment I feel pretty damn comfortable with the design portion of the site being more or less fully realized and ready for business.

America's view of criminal violence and related justice is long overdue for an overhaul. Removing violent labels from all but the most necessary offenses will bring healing to countless justice-involved residents. Giving non-physical violence equal weight toward holistic loss and suffering will bring greater legitimacy to the Criminal Justice System and accountability to public figures who dangerously use stigmatizing generalizations for profit. Damage to a person's common sense of security, privacy, mental health, spiritual health, relationships, time, resources, reputation and potential must all be considered in determining fair and effective jurisprudence for malicious behavior in society.

The concept of justice has been eating at me to the point that I literally have no other choice but to heed its urgent call to arms if I ever wish to hear myself think again. So, this is an ongoing project to discover the truest form of justice and how we can apply it most effectively throughout human existence.

"You're gonna need a bigger boat." - Sheriff Brody

Passage of the First Step Act on December 21, 2018 was a much-needed shot in the arm. Seeing daylight fluttering shamelessly out in the open after so many dacades of brutal intimidation, wanton authoritarian plunder and unimpregnable utter fucking hopelessness was nothing short of an out of body experience. Borrowing from the goodwill and recent accomplishments of others I decided to make a push forward with PrisonRef and see what we could come up with. After a year-long hiatus I was finally able to size up the Action Plan intro and give it the freedom that every good idea, truth and being deserves.

In the hallowed sanctuary of my perfect humiliation through this noxious and melancholy existence, alas there is nothing more to living than dying for eternal usefulness. The final thread of the very end of my rope is whispering that it's okay to let go now but a will greater than my own is compelling me to hold on. It is tempting to board the next thing smokin' past this seemingly god forsaken planet regardless of cost and destination, but the passing and the dying are two separate issues and celestial departure will have to wait. I must continue dangling here for dear life and the greatest good of God and Man until sufficient progress is made for all. Everyone pushing me down can go straight to hell.

Having exhausted peaceful protest for nearly six years without results, it seems that there is no peaceful means of bringing justice to America's Criminal Justice System and reclaiming my own freedom. The incredible sadness of this realization along with the many celebrity suicides of late has really pushed me to the edge. Also, as of April 16th I'm not supposed to be on parole supervision anymore but some committee of strangers gave me an additional two years without reason. The only thing left is violence, which I will give to God and let him choose what to do with it. I finally have no other choice but to slap a big red nose on all these clowns and take my respect. I am redeemed.

Since we're all here and have to live together we might as well settle in and make the most of it. Seems like the human thing to do. Restroom's down the hall and to the right. Breakfast is ready between 6 and 8 most days. If you make a mess, please clean it up. Let me know if you need anything.

Finding genuine happiness and lasting peace with someone today is quite possibly more difficult than any time before in human history. For those of us who continue to pursue love despite the growing challenges, I salute thee. The quest itself is a sweet reward and validation of our tremendous courage and valor. To the victors go the spoils of romance in the pressure cooker.

The fourth and final draft of PrisonRef has come to fruition after 1,948 days of blood, sweat and tears. The hardest part should be over finally. I'll be taking some time off before writing the Action Plan. If anyone is interested in taking on development responsibilities please let me know. Graphic design experience is also welcomed. My sincere respect and appreciation to all who have helped this human rights milestone become a reality. Your kindness and support will never be forgotten.

The first big update of the site is now finished. My hope is that the creativity and inspiration found in the process will yield some momentum to other projects. I despirately needed to lose myself in something prolific, constructive and reasonable heading into the emotional junkyard of the holidays. Mission accomplished. Now I'm too numb through sheer mental exhaution to care about or pay much attention to anything, and it feels absolutely wonderful. Prayers and positive thoughts to all. See you next year.

I'm ready to move on and begin anew. I have done everything that I can to help the world around me. Now it's time to try to find some happiness for myself.

The third draft of the prison reform site is online (PrisonRef.com). PrisonRef is now mobile ready and can be viewed at all device sizes. Much of the content remains dummy text for design purposes but the look and feel have begun to convey a message of their own. This update is dedicated to our many veterans who have needlessly lost so much of their lives and faith in humanity while mercilessly forsaken in the U.S. Criminal Justice System.

This is my final update to the site. Finish line be damned...

Went to bed last night feeling aweful after being treated like garbage by someone in authority. This morning I woke up so lost in the fray and unable to see the forest from the trees. After a few sips of coffee I was gently prompted to stay the course and so decided it was time to summerize my understanding of love in an attempt to note my own ongoing progress in life. I feel a lot better now.

Man, I just don't know what to say anymore. The whole damn world has gone sideways and the life being forced upon me is a fictitious caricature of existance derived from the personal deficencies of other folks. More and more often I find myself in a black and frigid tunnel without fight where reason and human decency will seemingly never hold value. The following is an interactive presentation of the concept of respecting life. Interacting with the words momentarily displaces them. Pressing down for about a second moves everything around. The point is that universal concepts, principles and truths will never change no matter how much mankind attempts to deny, manipulate and destroy them.

The second draft of the prison reform site is online (PrisonRef.com). Lots of cool changes have been made since just before New Years and I can really see a clear identity coming together. Still not mobile ready yet, much of the content is only dummy text for design purposes and many of the links do nothing. This update was pure guts. Glad it turned out.

Every day of this life is a miracle and a testament to humankind's immeasurable will to live. I could pass right now and be satisfied with my collective efforts through a very difficult life and with who I have become. That being said, survival is not fulfillment and loneliness is a real son of a bitch. Water and sunshine could do me good.

The initial rough draft of the prison reform site has been posted online (PrisonRef.com). It isn't mobile ready and many of the links are broken, but it's a start. My primary ambition at this point was to begin putting something together that had unlimited potential for meaningful expression and positive change.

After several years of reconstructive "life work," and having eaten more humble pie than ever thought possible, suddenly I have arrived at that place of peace and quiet understanding wherein love is much overdue and all else is much ado about nothing.

The Projects section of the site is now ready for visitors. This is where I'll be sharing the process of attempting to create additional mediums of expression that I believe can make a significant positive difference in the world. These are some pretty heavy endeavors so it may take some time to get the ball rollin'. All prayer and good thoughts are very much appreciated.

The Memoirs section of the site is up and runnin'. So much of mankind's experiences and recorded history has been lost to neglect, war and climate change. The memoirs section contains some of the truths from my own personal thoughts, feelings, dreams and experiences.

The Barriers Bible Study is available for download and as an interactive online presentation. The study is about life's barriers and was written in response to a spiritual experience that I had while in prison.